Sunday, December 4, 2011

NC10: Something You're Afraid of (fear)

I don't have something. I have plenty of things to be scared of. Fear is normal. Fear is also constant. I can't overcome something I am not afraid of. That would just be silly.

Here are list of my rational and irrational fears:

1.  Fear of unknown. The best and most common fear. I admit, I have failed to try several things because of this fear. Questions like "what would I expect there?", "what happens if...?", etc. are just excuses. We can't overcome this fear if we don't try.

2.  Fear of becoming poor. I am not rich, nor are my parents. So I don't expect any inheritance from them. We just have enough to live by and to afford necessary and often, unnecessary needs. But the thought of not having money, or not being able to afford the necessities, scares me. I don't know why. I guess, that's why I work so hard and try to live the life I wanted.

3.  Fear of death. Death is inevitable. We will all die eventually. But the thought of dying right now, where I am unaccomplished, unsatisfied and discontent with my life, scares me. Makes me feel inadequate. That I don't have much time.

4.  Fear of rejection.  I don't want to feel unwanted and rejected.

5.  Fear of losing my faith.  Sometimes I feel that I have neglected my faith and that I have taken God for granted. Knowing that God is constant and that He will be faithful to me is my strength. Unfortunately, there are times when I feel that I don't feel God, that I don't need Him and I have taken Him aside. It scares me to come to a point when I lose my faith completely and I will never know who I am anymore.

There are even more fears that I haven't had the chance to write. I have never explored more of my weaknesses. I admit that these fears are what holds me back. I am scared to take risks that could be both fulfilling and uplifting. Maybe if I let go, I would have the life that I have wanted and the life God has planned for me.

No comments:

Post a Comment